Top Chef Goes Fishing

I was excited about this episode because I kinda have a secret crush on Eric Ripert (shhhh.. I know.. I don't want to hear it) and he also knows his shit. Who wouldn't want to go to Le Bernardin and eat 6 amazing dishes with Eric Ripert (charming frenchman) and Tommy C (new nickname.. HOLLA!)?

The quickfire was actually really aptly timed since next week in Culinary School we are learning how to filet fish - I'm very excited since I'm completely intimidated by ocean creatures. Needless to say, the eel that was still halfway alive almost made me vom up my dinner.

I gotta say, every episode, I hold my breath for Fabio's sake. I mean, he was so effing cute with his wife...so much so that even though I'm picturing running her over with Monster Truck, I still find it really endearing. I wanna marry someone who calls me Amore? Is that too much to ask?

I'm gonna be completely honest -if I had been any of these chefs, I would have needed Depends and a wash cloth. I don't even like dicing onions in front of my culinary school chef.

That Hollandaise Lobster thing that Stefan recreated looked AMMMAZING. Plus, I now know from experience how freaking difficult it is to make hollandaise. Props and Hats off to German Stefan for ripping that skin of the eel and HAMMERING ITS HEAD TO A CHOPPING BLOCK AND winning the elimination challenge.

I was holding my breath as all the dishes were tasted - hoping Josea, Stefan, and Fabio would be in the clear and the other ones would go down in flames... well that's not necessarily true. I want Carla to stay but I like when she's in the bottom 3 because that's when she blurts out some crazy shit. Best comment hands down was when Eric Ripert referred to Jamie's salty-ass celery as "hardcore" - when I think of hardcore I think of bondage and low-budget porn, not a vegetable.

Also, a quick shout-out to classically trained chefs (especially French ones) - it made me feel validated for going to FCI. Maybe one day I will perfectly recreate Eric Ripert's dish as well. So bonus points to Crazy-Pants Carla. But hang on, I'm going to take away her bonus points and give her minus points since, hello, is it me or was she kinda normal this episode? I'm not settling for ehhhh food if I'm not getting googly eyes and "BADOWS!" every episode. I'm sorry but I'm just not.

In the end, I'm glad I saw Jamie go - I mean, she complains non-stop and she was being a ginormous Debbie Downer about the whole challenge. Don't let that rainbow flag hit you on the way out sir!

Next week looks insane - Fabio obviously injures himself and I hope he doesn't get sent home because of it. I want to see him go to the final four and do some amazing shiz.

Stay tuned guys and thanks for reading!